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JESUS LOVES ME BUT HE CAN’T STAND YOU
I’m drinking alone this Christmas.
I’ve hired a wino to decorate my home.
I’ve put a bar in the back of my car so I can drive myself to drink.
Jesus, will you be drinking with me this Christmas?
Will you be thinking of me if you do?
My head hurts and my feet stink.
I don’t know whether to kill myself or go bowling.
*Compiled from C&W song titles.